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Thursday, December 31, 2015

The Underground Review: Bijou Wear Royal Blast

Wrap: Bijou Wear Royal Blast
Size: 3
Wrappee: 6 month old, 22 month old, 3 year old, & 4.5 year old!


Our first uppies in Royal Blast were by accident. I had checked the mail to find it had arrived just before arriving at the pediatrician to realize I had forgotten a wrap! So, I quickly thanked my lucky stars for good timing and pulled the mystery wrap from its packaging. Immediately realizing it was a shortie, I tied a quick rebozo and plopped by six month old in it for her check up. I was instantly amazed by how comfortable this carry was, how content my daughter felt (despite her shots that day), and how unwavering the slipknot was throughout the visit. If you've tried slipknots before, then you know how often wraps can fail at holding a solid slipknot, despite re-tightening and re-tightening. This was a whole new level of wrap. Solid from the start, it stood strong throughout the 2 hour event. This was the beginning of getting to know the Slipknot Tester.





I nicknamed Royal Blast as such because it has the perfect amount of grip to hold a solid slip knot. In fact, I loved it so much, rebozo become my favorite carry! (You know a wrap is good when it causes you to rethink your favorite carries.) The strength of this wrap makes it a true workhorse. Comfortable for your baby, as it feels lighter than its density would suggest, but solid enough to handle any test you give it. If you are in need of a wrap that can handle a slip knot like a boss, then this is a must have. It has the grip you need with some of the glide that forgives. But alas, I am getting ahead of myself. Because I haven't begun to discuss my favorite part of any wrap: the design.





Royal Blast is named for the gorgeous icy blue coloring and the design that mimics blasting fireworks. If you are like me, and desire wraps that are unique and beautiful, this is definitely a wrap to add to your stash. In darker lights, it boasts of a true royal blue. It sunlight, it shines like a winter ice. And the design allows for beautiful right or wrong side wearing (which is my favorite part of any wrap!). My daughters loved this design so much that even my 37 lb, 4 year old begged to be carried before I sent it away.




So, what do I think? Is this a wrap everyone should have in their stash? If you are like me and have an older baby or toddler in your wrappee group, then YES! Snatch this wrap up! I am already missing my tester greatly, and might have to snatch this up myself when it goes on sale this morning. So don't miss it! Grab your Royal Blast today!

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

The Woman Behind Twirleez

When Twirleez partnered up with Colorful Baby, I found myself giddy to see the creations that awaited us. I was not disappointed. The blankets, scarves, and-oh my!-the hippo are absolutely perfect. They speak to the beautiful wrap designs of Miranda Kay and the talented sewing fingers of Kelly Pfau Borsman. I couldn't help but speak to Kelly about how she came to this wonderful collaboration, and I learned quite a bit about this awesome woman. Kelly, wife of 12 years with five beautiful babies, has been sewing since childhood. Learn more about her in our conversation below...



Why team up with Miranda Kay of Colorful Baby?

Teaming up with Miranda is super cool. She is already an established online business, people love her wraps, and it gives me the opportunity to create stuff without as much overhead. Plus she lived in my town and is super sweet and kind.

When is the first time you touched a sewing machine? What was it like?

Oh gosh.... My mom taught me. I think I was like 9 or 10. My first 'big' project was an apron for 4-H. My mom had an old vintage black metal Singer machine that was my great grandma's. It was ancient but created so many things.

What is your favorite thing it has ever created?

Hmm that's a hard one.... I've made my baby's blankets, and clothes and toys. That WcMT (Wrap Conversion Mei Tai)! That was fun. Some super fun costumes for the kiddos. I can't really come up with one thing, the list grows as I think of what I've made over the years.

So you still use that same machine?

No, it finally got retired about 5 years ago.

Did your mom, grandma, or great grandma sew for a living?

No, it was just for household use. My mom made us clothes and curtains and bedding.

Do you consider this to be a job for you?

I guess I haven't sold enough to really consider it a job. I just enjoy sewing! So to be able to sell is a fun bonus.

How does it make you feel to imagine that your creation could become a baby's first toy or dedicated blankie?

Oh I love that part! I love thinking about people using them! And hopefully enjoying them.

Miranda gave me this quote about you: "Her work and sewing abilities are impeccable."

Oh wow!!!!! That totally made my day!!!!!


If you want to purchase some of the Twirleez goodies, please check out http://www.mycolorfulbaby.com/twirleez/.


Monday, November 30, 2015

'Tis the Season for OCD

'Tis the season for cookie baking, tree decorating, and mental illness mocking--among other things. I must admit, I never noticed this trend before this year. If someone had mentioned the ridiculous ways people compare the mental illness of OCD to loving Christmas, I would have scoffed. That is, until I was diagnosed myself.

In September of this year, I was diagnosed with postpartum OCD. I was shocked and confused. I didn't have to have everything in a specific place. I didn't need to count to number five every time I opened or shut the door. I was not what everyone says OCD is. Except that I learned that most people who talk about OCD use it as a joke. Take the following Target sweater for sale this season: 


It likens OCD to loving a holiday very very much. Is that what OCD really means? Or take this meme by @simoncholland and shared by Scary Mommy:


It compares OCD to being a perfectionist when it comes to Christmas tree decorating. I could barely keep the house clean at the time of my diagnosis. There was no way I had OCD. Not if these truly reflected the symptoms.

Well, it turns out they don't. OCD is not the same as being passionate about a holiday or being a perfectionist. My symptoms were not nearly as joyful and pretty. My symptoms came from a much darker place. I worried. All. The. Time. Not normal worries mind you. I worried that my children were going to kill my infant daughter. I kept her hidden away in another room for hours to ensure they couldn't touch her. I also worried that someone would take away my children because I was not a suitable mother. This worry drove me to weeping and shaking, as I could not think of anything else once they showed up. They got so loud and so scary that I sat in my doctor's office rocking and crying, begging her to make the bad thoughts go away. This was all on top of the normal worries, that I turned into obsessions, like whether I had remembered to put all of the children in the car or turned off the coffee maker before I left. My life was filled with so much fear I physically shook on a daily basis. I couldn't control the intrusive and irrational thoughts, and my mind was so broken that it would obsess over every thought that invaded my mental sanity.

But no, I didn't suddenly love holidays more or decorate Christmas trees any better.

I have received tons of support and help since those days, and I am doing much better with the assistance of therapy and medicine. But as these light-hearted jokes have been creeping up this holiday season, it got me thinking. Would we make these kinds of jokes about cancer? A broken arm maybe? Why is it that mental illness is so easy to mock without any feelings of guilt or fear of repercussions? And when someone attempts to call out such bad taste in humor, they're actually shamed for not being able to take a joke, like Scary Mommy whose warning to those offended for any reason is this:



I am not saying I can't take a joke. I am simply saying that my illness isn't funny. It is scary. It threatened my very existence, and changed my life forever. I wish it came with the symptoms of baking lots of cookies or beautifully decorating my home, but alas it does not. OCD is not the same as being particular about how you like this or that. It is a much darker illness that makes it impossible to see Christmas as something beautiful and joyful all together. So please, reconsider how you use the term this holiday season. Because part of this season should include being grateful you don't have OCD, not pretending that you do.

Monday, November 23, 2015

Black Friday Deals 2015: Babywearing Edition

Are you ready for deals??? I will be posting all babywearing deals I find for Black Friday, including wrap scrap businesses as well! 

5 Minute Recess is offering up to 50% off on early Black Friday deals NOW. Check out the deals HERE


Babyhawk is offering 15% off all orders right NOW. Use code "xmas2015" 


Cuddle Stuff Boutique is already offering Black Friday deals! Receive 15% off by using code "RINGDEAL"


Cari Slings is doing a sale from now until Monday, making certain wraps only $110. You can find their selection of sale wraps HERE


Diva Milano is offering 20% off on their entire store with code "BF2015" through November 29th. 
Flying Feathers Shop is offering $25 off all swings in the shop. Use code "Take25"


Little Hugs Boutique will be offering 15% OFF the whole shop from Thanksgiving thru Small Business Saturday. Use Coupon Code "THANKS15"


Madame Googoo is offering 15% off in-stock baby carriers. Email them at info@madamegoogoo.com with BLACKFRIDAY2015 in the subject line.

Mercy Baby Boutique will be offering 25% off water slings, and purchases come with a free teether, Black Friday through Cyber Monday. Use code "Thanks25"


Natural Days Shop will be doing 20% off everything in their store. 


Paxbaby.com will be offering the following deals on Black Friday:
Take 40% off PAXbaby's entire KoKaDi category! code KKD 
Take 30% off our Woven Wrap category! code WRAP 
Take 20% off all ring slings at PAXbaby.com! code SLING 
Take 10% off any Tula order PLUS add a $200 Grab Bag for only $100! code WEAR

EVERY ORDER OVER $150 WILL RECEIVE A FREE rainbow Unicorn Horn from Brooklyn Owl! Please use UNICORN in your order notes; supplies are limited!

Risaroo Baby Carriers will be holding a "12 Days of Christmas" starting on Black Friday that will include sales, giveaways, and new releases!


Risaroo Wovens will be holding a "12 Days of Christmas" starting on Black Friday. On Friday, get 25% off all in stock items by using code "BLACKFRIDAY".


SweetPea Ring Slings will be offering $10 off all ring slings during Thanksgiving weekend. Use code "Thankful"


Tender Toes will be offering free shipping to any order placed on Black Friday AND Small Business Saturday! Use Coupon Code on Etsy "TENDERTOES"


Wrap Scrap Creations will be giving a free keytag with any purchase made during Black Friday/Thanksgiving weekend.


Wrap Scrap Frames will have 20% off all frames on Black Friday.


Wrap Scrap Stash will be doing freebies from Thanksgiving through Monday with all orders. There will be special codes that will go live throughout that time for % off various items. There will also be one special right to buy a woven wrap (surprise - WSS picks) at the awesome price of just $10 (free USA shipping) for anyone who places an order during that time as well.


Wrap Your Baby is offering 25% off all in-stock wraps from Black Friday through Cyber Monday. Use code "FAMILY"

Your Favorite Attic will be offering 25% off on Black Friday. Use code "TURKEY25" Also, on their FB Page they will be offering giveaways and flash sale codes!


Zanytoes will be offering 30% off from November 28th-November 30th. Use code "THANKS2015"

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

The Underground Review: Sweet Pea Doll Sling

Wrap: Sweet Pea Ring Slings Doll Ring Sling

Wrappee: Little Baby Hope Doll



I wasn't sure how my daughters would react to wearing their own baby dolls, but I figured it wouldn't hurt for them to have a carrier of their own. I will admit now that having only one available for them to try was a mistake. Their excitement over getting to "wear like mommy" was overwhelming, and bickering quickly ensued over who would get to try it first.



This doll ring sling from Sweet Pea Ring Slings as absolutely beautiful. The fabric is soft against my little ones' skin, the colors are precious and perfect for my sweet daughters, and the quality is top notch. Just because it is made for dolls does not mean it is created with any less care or consideration.  I should also add that while we received a ring sling made from a more feminine fabric, Sweet Pea makes doll ring slings with a variety of fabrics to suit your son or daughter's tastes. I was very impressed with this wonderfully designed and well-made doll carrier. This is obviously a play item made to last throughout one's childhood.

All of my daughters took a turn with this lovely ring sling. We only had a very petite doll for this wearing session, but this sling could easily accommodate a doll or teddy bear of most sizes and provide a comfortable carry. Notable quotes from our doll-wearing session included the following:

"Wow, it's so pretty!"
"Mama, look I'm wearing like you!"
"Awww...baby sweeping now."



My girls were able to tighten and loosen the ring sling on their own without difficulty. Front carries and hip carries, with baby doll's arms in or out were not a problem for my 4 year old, 2.5 year old, or 22 month old. My most enthusiastic babywearing daughter requested to do a back carry, and this mama was easily able to adjust the ring sling to fit my daughter's desired carry with ease.



If you are looking for beautiful, budget-friendly babywearing play items for your children, let me be the first to recommend Sweet Pea Ring Slings for your purchase. Inexpensive in price but high quality in its creation, this ring sling will be a treasured item for years to come in your home.

Sunday, November 15, 2015

5 Things Toddlers do that Lead to a Better Life

As a mother of four, I have experienced a lot of those unbelievably funny, gross, frustrating and overwhelming moments in life. I've had those days when I wonder what I was thinking. But I have begun to realize that my children have a LOT to teach me. The thing is, since having children my life has been filled with more joy, laughter, and love than ever before. (Don't worry, this is NOT a post about how people with kids have fuller lives than those who don't.) It just got me thinking, how has acting more like my children changed my life for the better? Well, here are five of the things that have changed my life--and maybe they could do the same for you!



1) Laugh when they fall down. This is one of my daughters' favorite games. Yes, I said game. They fall down, laugh hysterically, and get back up again--only to fall down in laughter! This is the complete opposite of an adult's normal reaction to a fall. We adults tend to react to our trips and stumbles with tears and self-loathing and maybe even a ton of binging on wine and chocolate (not that I would know anything about it).  Yet as a parent, I have found that the bigger of a deal I make a fall, the harder my daughters will take it. If I laugh it off, so do they! And you know what? Most falls in life really aren't as bad as we adults make them out to be. Laughing more and self-loathing less....the affect is instant and priceless!

2)  Announce when they poop. Oh, I don't mean calmly  and privately letting me know so I can assist them with wiping. I mean running into the living room, undies in hands, and screaming with pride, "I made a big poopy!" Oh yes. This happens. And why not? We all poop. And to be honest, I can't tell you the number of times I've had a particularly wonderful #2 experience and felt weird wishing I had someone to tell. The truth is, we have been taught to feel shame for a bodily function we ALL experience. By letting go of shame over a ridiculously normal act, we can learn to let go of shame for other things too...think periods, farts, snorting laughs, love of Lady Gaga--whatever happens to be on your blushing list.

3) Applaud everything! And I do mean everything. Every song, every twirl, every pouring of a cup of tea or pretending to be a horse. They applaud themselves. They applaud me. It may be something I have done a million times, but to them it is a task I should be proud of--even if it is loading the dishwasher or mooing like a cow. So why don't we adults applaud ourselves--and each other--more? Could you imagine the change in your attitude if you received cheers every time you turned in a report or folded a load of laundry? What if we said a (sincere, excited, high energy) thank you and congratulations every time someone we love did something positive?  How quickly would we change the course of our lives, and the lives of those around us?

4) Cheer and give hugs every time they see me. This is may favorite part of every day. I open the front door, peek around the corner, and witness the pure joy of my daughters running to greet me, screaming "Mama!" with arms wide open.  I know there will come a day when this does not happen. Every time it does, I hug them tightly and promise God not to forget this feeling ever. Yet, when we see those we love, we often take for granted their presence. We may see them everyday. We may have known they were on their way. Yet, I have known far too many people who had plans to see someone...that never arrived. Let's not take our loved ones for granted. Let's exclaim how much we missed them, how incredible they are, how much they mean to us. Don't leave any words unspoken or hugs left in empty arms.

5)  Say no. Ok, so I admit that this one is not often something I enjoy my daughters doing. When they don't want to, when they don't like it, when they think it's not fair or ok, the no's start coming out loud and clear! And while this isn't always the best thing for me (believe me, nap time was a struggle today), I have learned how easy--and important--it is to say no. How often do you say no to something you don't want to do? How often do you say no to something that feels wrong or not for you? Society teaches us to be agreeable, pleasing to others, appropriate in situations. Does that mean we should disregard our own feelings for everyone else's? Maybe it's time for us to admit when we need to say no, and stand up for our needs by stepping away when we need to.

There you go! Just five things my daughters have taught me to make my life a better one. I hope my sharing their little toddler wisdom can help you make your life a little better also.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

The Underground Review: Natibaby Through the Looking Glass Again

Wrap: Paxbaby's exclusive Natibaby Through the Looking Glass Again (100% cotton edition)

If you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you.

Falling down the rabbit hole happened quickly and without much preparation. The Queen of Hearts must have planned for this, my confusion, with the hemmed rails facing opposite directions! Which way is right? Which way is wrong? Every direction looked oddly beautiful and entrancing as the patterns caught my eye and changed my mind with every pass.

Curiouser and Curiouser!

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense...

The wrap felt thick like the haze of the caterpillar's smoke, enveloping me in this new experience and causing me to forget a world other than this. Millie teetered between giggles and yawns, a Jabberwocky's reprise found in her delightful coos. Relaxing in the embrace of the wrap, she found solace in this new place without a care for the cold reality she had left behind. The grip of this wrap was strong and comforting, allowing for us to stay or possibly demanding that we do. How many minutes, hours, passed as we rocked and swayed and snuggled in this woven world of wonderment?

I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then...


I'm not strange, weird, off, nor crazy, my reality is just different from yours.

She generally gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it). 

Alice had got so much into the way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way things to happen, that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the common way.

If this is merely a piece of fabric, then I am ever the fool. For as we unwrapped and folded up to save for another time, I grew cold in the mundane reality of the day and longed to wrap us again and travel back into the fog of fondness and forgetfulness. No wonder the rabbit is always late to somewhere. Time stands still there, I am sure of it, and I long to go back so I may cradle my little one in the curious state of love without worry of tomorrow.


Monday, October 26, 2015

Dear Bugaboo, From a Fluffy Mama

(The original post can be fund at The Catholic Mama.)

Dear Bugaboo,

You've been getting a lot of flack lately. Your latest ad of a stick thin model jogging around in a bikini while using your $800 stroller has caused some upset. Moms feel shamed, mocked, and just plain inadequate. I can't say I blame them (have you seen that model's stomach?). 

Bugaboo ad

The truth is though, while your ad may seem absurd, it is meant for a different mother than I. I am the mother of four children under four, living on one income, choosing on a daily basis whether to go to the park or get the kitchen clean. I do not have the money for your stroller--or the personal trainer that I'm sure would have to come with it for me to begin looking like that model. In fact, the only stroller I've ever purchased was $25 at Target. (Do you know what a Target is, I wonder?)

But--I don't judge the mother who CAN buy your stroller. I don't judge the mother that is able and willing to hire a maid, nanny, and personal trainer to make it possible to attain that model's body. I don't fault any mother for having those kinds of funds and using them in a way that promotes self-love, a healthy lifestyle, and (God forbid) a little mommy pampering!

I just know I will never be that mother. I will never look like that. (Though if I did, I would totally go everywhere in that bikini--grocery store, play dates, you name it!) However, I am ok with that truth. I have a word for my stomach, and it's not "tight", "six-pack", or "hard". 

It's "fluffy". 

I don't use that word to equal "fat". I have a beautiful body. I simply recognize that my stomach is softer after having four children; it is a touch wrinkly and resembles tiger stripes. And I have to admit--I love it! I love my body just as much as the mother who buys your stroller loves hers.

My fluffy tummy

Perhaps the mothers who are offended by your ad have not yet learned to love their body. Maybe they are struggling to remember how beautiful they are in a world that believes we should be up and running once the baby hits the bassinet. It can be a difficult transition to go from "sexy single", to "glowing pregnant", to  "your baby is sooooo cute!" (Note that last one forgets the mother all together.) When that transition happens, it is up to us to find our self-love and new understanding of beauty...and sometimes ads like yours feel like an attack on our insecurities. 

I am proud of the mother who jogs. I am just as proud of the mother who eats Oreos at 3am while nursing her 6 month old to a sound track of Netflix movies. (And the truth is, I fully believe I may have just described the same mother in those two sentences--depending on the day!) So, by all means, sell your couture strollers and glorify the fit-focused mother. I'll do my part on this end to glorify the fluffy, not-quite-as-able-to-afford-couture mother. And hopefully we will all begin to realize the beauty we hold in this new role and remember to love ourselves for who we are. 

Sincerely,
A Fluffy Mama

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

The Underground Review: Risaroo Wovens Tetris Fog

Wrap: Risaroo Wovens Tetris Fog


This should be a blanket, I thought to myself as my hand gently grazed the woven fabric. This is too soft and smooth to be a wrap. I borrowed it anyway, because the gorgeous design and breathtaking fading charcoal to cream left me wondering--hoping?--it could work. (I'm a sucker for dark greys.) 


This is a wrap I'd like to take out for a latte. Not a pumpkin spice, because it is far from basic. It shimmers in its ombré progression of light to dark (or dark to light depending on your mood) and wraps you up like your favorite sweater. It breathes enough for the occasional ray of Sunshine through the cloudy day, and keeps you warm when the storm comes. 


This is not your baby's wrap. It's yours, from contemporary design to throw back name, this wrap is meant to keep you as comfortable as your little one. And boy does it ever. If a wrap could be too smooth, this would be it, not catching or clingy at any point in the experience. Yet it was supportive enough to handle a fancy finish without digging into my shoulders or losing the strong grip on my lil monster of a toddler. She gave it a pair of duck lips and a solid "Rock on!"





So, if you have a chance to try this unique and oh-so-comfortable piece of wrap fashion, do it. And don't forget to to enjoy your cup of coffee as it wraps you and your little one against those cool Autumn days. 



Sunday, October 18, 2015

The Cardinal Rules of the BSTs (a.k.a. A History of My BST Mess Ups)

Vocabulary Explanation for this post:
BST = Buy/Sell/Trade
TV/MV = Trade Value/Market Value
FSOT = For Sale or Trade
Stash = Collection of baby carriers
MMAO/MMARO = Make Me An Offer/Make Me A Reasonable Offer
PM = Private Message



A third title to this post could be "My Deeply Apologetic Letter to L.C.", the initials representing the babywearing mama whom I less than tactfully broke one of these rules with when attempting to negotiate a trade once. I did not end up completing the trade, but I did learn a very good lesson. Thankfully, she was kind enough to help me better understand how BSTing works, even after I had been ignorantly disrespectful to her. The only thing that made me feel less guilty was knowing I was not the only newbie on the BST groups to have broken a rule or two. "Babywearers Beware" stories pop up rather regularly, critiquing the tact of buyers or sellers in how they do business. And if you are new to the babywearing community, let me tell you this: it's a small world after all, and you will encounter these babywearing parents again, so choose your interactions wisely.

That being said, if you are new to the world of BSTs, how do you know what is ok and what is not regarding sales and negotiations? Well, that is where this post comes in. This will not cover everything under the sun (and I'm not talking Butterfly Baby Co.), but should give you a strong jumping off point for diving into the BST groups head on! So, read, take notes, and get started on growing that stash!



Read the BST Group Rules

The first thing you should do the moment you join a BST group is read the rules. Every BST group is different, and reading the rules prevents you from pissing off the all-powerful Admin and looking like a dork. Even people who have read the rules once sometimes need a refresher, so don't assume you know it all or that they're all the same. Take the time to do this so your FSOT post isn't deleted before it's read!

Give Full Disclosure When Selling

As a seller, it may be tempting to pretend that tiny coffee stain isn't there, or that you didn't notice the small pull that you're (almost 87%) certain won't affect the safety of the wrap. The thing is though, carriers aren't cheap. Even carriers sold in the budget swap groups are still a pretty penny to the low to middle income family, and they deserve their money's worth. If you know your carrier isn't perfect, say so and explain why. It may not matter to the buyer or it may ruin the sale. But finding out which one beforehand saves you a lot of hassle afterward.

Ask All the Questions Before Buying

Yes, the seller should list all imperfections or concerns in their For Sale posting, but you know what you get for assuming, right? It is up to YOU to make sure YOUR soon-to-be-wrap is everything YOU expect it to be when it arrives. So, ask questions. Request more pictures. In a variety of lighting! Even feel free to get seller's feedback on what they liked or disliked about it. You may not want to create hassle, but remember that this is a big purchase and you want to like what you're paying for.




Be Paypal Ready

In the world of online BSTs, the payment method is pretty standard: Paypal. While this method is not completely fool proof, it does allow for a mostly seamless transaction--as long as you are prepared. Let me put it this way, you wouldn't walk up to the checkout with a cart full of groceries and ask the cashier to hold your items while you go look at your mom's house for your purse. Buying a carrier is no different. It is unfair to the seller and other potential buyers to make an agreement to purchase a carrier, then disappear for hours or days because you need to transfer funds or set up an account. It may result in you being skipped over for a wrap you deeply want or finding yourself the topic of not-so-kind feedback at the end of the day.

Always Use Goods/Services

If you are new to Paypal, then it is easy to think that sending money via Friends or Family (also known as "gifting") is the way to go. After all, no fees equals more money, right? The problem with this mindset is that there is no legal protection if you send or receive money this way. Get your wrap in the mail and find it's more holes than fabric? Send your wrap to a buyer and they suddenly cancel payment? You can submit a claim for any purchase made through Goods and Services! Oh, you sent or received your money through Friends and Family? Oops. Sucks to be you!

Do not question selling price or TV

In the world of BSTs, there will always be the seller that over prices their carrier. Whether they are doing so out of sentimental value, in anticipation for negotiations, or because they simply don't know the value of their wrap, it is important to remember one thing: they get to choose how much value their carrier holds to them. Don't agree with their value choice? Then don't buy it. Interested in buying it but hoping to do so for a slightly lower price? Then phrase your offer this way: "I would love to purchase your wrap but can only afford ______ at this time." or "I am interested in trading your wrap for mine, but am unable to offer more than ____ in paypal at this time." Notice that both of these statements speak to what you are willing to give, instead of stating what you believe you should have to give.

Do Not Post Offers in Comments

Now that you've learned how to make an offer for a carrier, now it's important to know where to make your offer. Just as it is tactless to discuss money in a public social setting (imagine asking someone how much they make in their job at a dinner party), it is also impolite to make an offer or ask if they would take less money in the comments of their post. In fact, many sellers believe it isn't tactful to offer a lower amount unless specifically stated "MMAO" or "MMARO". But if you are very seriously interested and wish to make an offer you can afford, the best way to do this is to write PM in the comments, and send them a private message with your offer of purchase or trade for them to review,

Do Not Low-Ball the Seller

While making an offer in private is more tactful than doing so in public, there is a point when a low offer is too low. Low-Balling the seller is generally considered to be when you make an offer of less than $50 of the stated price or 25% less than priced (for low-budget or high-end priced carriers). While making an offer may be acceptable or encouraged, it is important to recognize that low-balling sends an entirely different message. If you don't believe a wrap is worth the price, don't insult the seller by low-balling. Simply look for a different wrap. The truth is, a low-ball offer tends to say more about the buyer than the seller.



Always Check Feedback Before BSTing

Since the world of BSTs takes place on the oh-so-magical interwebz, chances are you will be doing business with complete strangers. While most of these strangers are your everyday, fellow babywearing enthusiasts, it is important to remember that there may or may not be a bad apple out there trying to take advantage of your naivety. Because of this possibility, it is integral that you check the feedback link of anyone you are considering BSTing with. What is a feedback link? It is a link to an album for people who has done business with a person to leave feedback regarding how that business went! This makes it easier for you to determine if you want to take the risk of BSTing with a specific person. What if a person does not yet have any feedback, you ask? At that point you must decide if you want to do business with someone who is new to the BSTs. The truth is, we all started out with no feedback, and you yourself may not have any yet. But this is another reason why it's good to use Goods and Services. It's simply safer that way.

Always Buy Insurance When You Ship

Whether shipping overnight or standard five-day postal service, it is outright crazy not to spend a few dollars it takes to make sure you'd get your money back if a shipment is lost. The truth is that packages get lost more often than we'd care to admit, and if you only use the $50 insurance that comes with a flat-rate envelope, you may find yourself out $150 if they lose your $200 wrap! Believe me, it's worth the $2-5 worth of insurance to not hold your breath until your wrap makes it from Malibu to Omaha!



Leave Feedback

So you bought or sold your carrier, had a lovely ol' time, and are ready to move on with life, yes? No! It is courteous to always leave feedback on the person's feedback link so others can have an accurate idea of what BSTing with that person was like. In the same manner, it is important to send your feedback link to the person you did business with so they can leave feedback on yours! Don't be afraid to remind them if they don't get to it right away. Feedback help builds your street cred on the BSTs, so it's worth following up on!


If you are already following these rules, then props to you for being awesome! I learned some of these the hard way, and others by reading the stories of fellow babywearers. Hopefully, this list will help you navigate the BSTs like a BOSS from now on!


Friday, October 16, 2015

The Underground Review: Pavo "XOXO"

Wrap: Unreleased Pavo "XOXO" (unofficial name)



At first glance, XOXO looks made of silk and the thin, smooth thread seems more painted than woven like brush strokes into letters of love. The dark charcoal color makes this wrap the perfect wear for daytime or night, from jeans and a t-shirt to a formal wedding. It is the wrapper's version  of the "the little black dress". This, my friends, is your perfect Little Black Wrap.


I must admit that I've had an affection for this wrap long before getting the chance to try it out, but from imagination to reality, this wrap was no disappointment. Since the mavens had greeted me at the door with champagne, my wrap job was just a tinsy bit clumsy. Lucky for me, this wrap could make any carry look good. It felt airy and light enough to be 100% cotton, but the way it made me feel like a million bucks caused me to wonder if it had blended some silk in there somewhere. I am a sucker for a beautiful "wrong" side, and took this opportunity to do a FRTR with a Poppins Finish to be able to show off its stunning reverse as well. It glided into place smoothly, and I can only imagine how supportive this wrap would be in a back carry. If Millie's gummy smile and refusal to let go was any indication of a good wrap, then I believe Pavo has a winner!


Rumor has it that this wrap will be released in the same manner as K&K, in 2016. The heart of K&K reminded us of National Heart Month, and Pavo dedicated proceeds to The Children's Heart Foundation. So, it is difficult not to notice the heart hidden in one of the XOXOs and wonder if its design was specifically to represent this cause dear to Pavo's heart for 2016. This is all speculation, mind you, but I would make sure to be ready for a stocking this February.


Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Hayden Panettiere, Postpartum Depression, and Me

I have a pair of pajama pants that sit in my drawer unused. They are missing the draw string, and their very presence scares me to death, but I will not throw them away.

No one ever told me Postpartum Depression could get that bad. And by "that bad" I mean so bad that your doctor tells your husband you may need to be admitted and your husband is sent home with your children to pack a bag in case you don't come home. So bad that he is told "no drawstrings allowed" and has to choose a pair of pajamas to cut the strings out of so you can have them in case your worst nightmare comes true. I didn't end up being admitted. I came home to find the scissors and string on the counter, and looked at him with all the apologies in the world for what he must have gone through inside having to face this darkness alongside me.



Hayden Panettiere, star of hit television series Nashville, was reported yesterday as voluntarily seeking treatment for her Postpartum Depression, according to People magazine. I have long respected her willingness to discuss her illness on national television, to give a voice to so many parents who feel lost and alone in the darkness of PPD. However, her choice to admit herself for treatment and counseling goes far beyond being an advocate and jumps straight into getting real about how serious PPD really is.

She couldn't handle the darkness on her own. Neither could I. While I ended up coming home that night, her courageous choice to stay leaves me in awe and admiration of her. Seeking help, contrary to societal stigma, is not a sign of weakness but of incredible strength. To choose your health, your family, and life over saving face (especially as a celebrity) deserves a hug and an applause. I wish I could write her a letter, tell her how brave she is and how much support she has, admit my own story as a reminder that she is not alone.

Though I may not be able to write to her, I can write to you. If you have struggled or are currently struggling with maternal mental illnesses, you are not alone. You are not weak. You are not less of a mother. Your illness is not your fate, it is simply an obstacle in your journey. A very real obstacle that requires a daily fight, the ability to ask for help (both medically and personally), and support from loved ones. But it is an obstacle that will go away with help. And your choice to to choose your health, your family, and life makes you one incredibly strong person. One worthy of a hug and applause. Whether you seek help as an outpatient or inpatient, seeking help is never the wrong choice. Know that there is someone here, behind the screen, rooting for you and fighting beside you.

We can beat this. We are worth the fight.