Postpartum Depression, Babywearing, and HOPE

In a home in Warren, Massachusetts, a mother stared in disbelief. Her Wrap Converted Mei Tai (WCMT) laid on the floor, frayed and partially eaten by a puppy with rather expensive taste. How could she have left it out? What would she tell the buyer? She shook away the tears coming to her, already overwhelmed with family struggles and the possibility of losing loved ones any day now. She took to her messages to try to explain to the buyer what had happened...

Meanwhile, in a home in Manor, Texas, a mother wept in her husband's arms. She confessed the overwhelming fear, sorrow, rage, and anxiety that had consumed her every thought. How could her husband still love her? Why would anyone think her worthy to care for her children? He brushed the tears from her eyes and promised they would find help to fix the intrusive thoughts and that he would never leave her. Too overwhelmed with her worry to sleep, she took to her messages to try to focus on something good...

The announcement of a new Girasol Exclusive release came this week. Without any background, the design is breathtakingly flawless, though it is not difficult to tell that a deeper story must have inspired such poignant beauty. Risaroo, the company releasing this gorgeous design, offered the following insight to this design: "Our newest Girasol Exclusive, Hope in the Dark, was designed to illustrate, through color, the struggles with postpartum depression." 

Photo from Risaroo's Facebook Page 

The response to this wrap thus far has been astounding. Mothers have spoken up about their own maternal mental illness with a rare openness and confidence than I have ever seen before. They have also begun to share about the babywearing community's role in their journey to recovery. You see, there is something very comforting and healing about physical touch, especially between a mother and her infant. In cases of the "typical" pregnancy, a mother holds her baby in her very womb, nourishing and caring for her little one for nine months. Even for mothers with complete mental health, the separation of mother from child after birth can cause a fair amount of stress and longing. For the mother suffering from postpartum illness of any kind, this stress can multiply tenfold. So, it should come as no suprise, though it is often not considered, that babywearing--the process of using a carrier or wrap to keep one's baby close more often--is beneficial to both mother and infant during the various stages of development after birth.

In the story above, I was, and still am, the mother weeping in her husband's arms. We have sought help, both medicinally and therapeutically, and we take life day by day, thanking God for the good days and reminding ourselves they will come again when the storm of bad days arrive. The mother whose wrap was affected by her precious little puppy did contact the buyer--who happened to be me. She told me she couldn't sell me the carrier, because it was no longer the same as it once was. I asked if the integrity of the carrier had been changed, if it had become unsafe. She assured me it hadn't, that she even had a plan of how to effectively patch up the torn parts and repair it. I began to cry. I told her I would still very much like to have it. Somehow for me it symbolized my own journey through Postpartum Depression: I was torn apart by the experience, but I was getting help to repair myself, and my integrity and ability to care for my children as I had been made to do was not changed. She willingly repaired the carrier and offered to give it to me for any price I could afford, so as not to add to my stress or anxiety. 

My "Perfect for Me" Mei Tai

The Risaroo exclusive Girasol wrap, Hope in the Dark, will be released on September 28th, at 2pm CDT. I am among many women who would love to own something made to represent our very struggles and beauty. The chances of me getting to purchase one, and being able to afford it, are slim. But I know that my HOPE is not found in a single wrap. It is not found in the threads or the color. Instead, as many mothers can attest I am sure, my hope is found in the support of my husband and loved ones. My hope is found in the ability to caryy my baby close to me during times of struggle. And my hope is found in the loving acceptance and encouragement of the babywearing community, represented by many like the mother who sold me that repaired carrier and offered to be there for me, a stranger, whenever I needed a friend.

Thank you.

***If you are concerned about your own maternal mental health, please feel free to check out www.postpartumprogress.com to learn more about the sign and symptoms of illness, and the steps you can take to get better.***